I was rapidly learning the difference between geldings and mares. Bentley is the most polite horse I have ever met and would die rather than stand on you, push you or be rude on the ground. If ever he forgets himself and does something out of character I only have to say sternly 'Bentley!' and he immediately looks chastised and behaves himself. Tommy is much the same. Tequila on the other hand didn't understand my rules and she definitely didn't understand my body language. The door was becoming more of an issue in that she wouldn't step back to let me in or out of the stable.
One evening whilst I was going in to skip out she actually swiped across my head with hers twice in about 30 seconds bashing me with her jaw on both occasions. Neither Tommy or Bentley would ever do that and it caught me by surprise. It was not the first time but never before had she done it in quite such a deliberate manner. I really believed that she was showing me that she was in charge of the stable and that I had to move my head for her. I was really feeling inadequate and stupid. I could step her back on a head collar or bridle but in her stable it was like I was invisible.
I came back into the house and rang Susan as I was losing the will to live with this horse. Susan gave me a massive talking to. You have to bear in mind here the position I was coming from. I had made mistakes with Jed which had resulted in him being too much for me, in the end he had to be handled by others when he got out of hand. I had hated him and been afraid of him. I had beaten myself to death about my part in the way he behaved and had vowed that I would do things differently in the future. I wanted to be an equal and respected but I was being soft and fluffy with Tequila. There was no equality because she had taken charge. There was no respect, in fact I would say that she actually was treating me as though I wasn't even there. She weighs over 500 kilos and I was trying to be gentle and soft with her and she was being brutal and rude with me. Susan told me that I must own the stable door, I must take it as mine. The answer wasn't to hit her or try and bully her but to give her a shock at my power over the door. She told me to take a crop into the stable with me not to hit Tequila with but to hit the door to make a loud bang which would make her step back. I was confused, I thought I had to be gentle with her, getting her love and trust but Susan pointed out to me that in a herd the lead mare would be quite overt in her control of the others. She would boot, bite, charge, pull faces at others that she wanted to move and although I was not able to do that with Tequila I must make her realise that I was in charge and to ignore me would result in a shock.
Frankly skeptical the next time I went back into the stable I took a crop with me. As I came back to the door to come out again Tequila did her usual trick of trying to shoulder me and swipe across my head with hers. I was ready and hit the door hard with the flap of the crop. She shot backwards as it sounded like a gunshot. I only ever had to do this once more the next time I was in the stable and she has never again tried to push me out of the way or swiped across my head. Simple, short and sharp but effective. No pain involved at all and we both know where we stand. Now as I approach the door to go in or come out she steps back and waits for me to vacate the area before she approaches. Result!!!
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